Sub sides...

[Cherry]

OK, I don't know how popular this is gonna be, since I don't know how many subbies there are hanging out around here, but I just wanted to throw this up to see where it goes.

I'm sub. Totally, happily exstatically sub. I get off on assignments to complete, orgasm denial, consensual beatings, hair pulling, biting, name calling and even certain levels of breath play. One of the happiest moments of my life was the day my girlfriend/Domme put my collar around my neck back in May of last year. We'd talked about it quite a lot. The collar she chose suited both of our likes, needs and desires. It's one I can take off, currently, if needs be. I've not taken it off in months. Not for anything. I sleep with it on, shower with it on, everything.

This past week, we decided we're ready for something more permenant. So, the next step there is forthcoming. Something we both like is an eternity collar. Simply put, it's a stainless steel ring, that fits around the neck and closes with a tiny screw. It then stays on. It can only be taken off by removing the screw. I'm not sure when I'll be getting it. It's not for me to say, after all. As her sub, it's my job to just accept. I've accepted this freely. I thrive on it.

Sometimes, simple things make me happy. Sitting nearly naked beside her on the sofa over the weekend, she turns to me and tells me she'd like a sandwich and a coke. I quite happily went up, made her the desired lunch and brought it to her, then took care of the dishes when she finished.

I truly enjoy my submissive status. It makes me feel truly complate in the knowledge of who and what I am.

Fell free to comment or question. As I said before, this thread is just to sort of put thoughts out here. It doesn't have to match anything I said. It's just HERE.

[Ann Andriani]

I just want to say that I congratulate you, Cherry!

You know who you are, what you like and what you're comfortable doing. I think that's wonderful. One look through this board and you'll see that's just not true with a lot of people.

Your confidence and comfort with yourself, I'm sure, is an inspiration to others.

Ann

i have a question.

do you ever have the feeling to switch roles?? i like being a dom but i constantly have the urge to be dominated...

[Cherry]

No. I'm not a switch. Being switch requires a certain trait that I just plani don't have. I need to give up control. I like knowing that my pleasure, my pain, my aching and my wanting bring HER pleasure, each in their own ways. I think each type of person (Dominant, submissive, switch) has specific qualities and none of them are better than the other. All of them are needed. They all have their place. For me, I'm just happy giving up everything and feelnig total freedom.

[paphia]

I read the online fantasy story of Harriet the Slave and the author really goes in depth into the mindset of a sub. Some of it just rubs me the wrong way. I don't think I could be either sub or dom, though I do like being told to do things. One thing I love is being told what underwear to put on, but I usually just ask him to pick it out for me. At this point in my life I am not interested in extremes, and the sub/dom relationship seems too extreme for me. I do like it as a fantasy, but just not one I would want to put into practice.

[Tiadrah]

Aww thank you Cherry.

Congrats to you Cherry!

I admire your relationship greatly but at the same time I am very happy in my own.

While we aren't as formal as is expected by many in the community on the fronts of language levels (apart from him calling me his slut) and the amount of day to day control my bf chooses to exert over me (this is largely left up to my discretion as long as he is happy with it and has no tasks he wants to set me), I have recently recieved my collars in the form of bracelets. I already have a little collar symbolising our everlasting love which I wear all the time so my bf picked out some beautiful bracelets for me.

On my left I wear my slave bells (they chime as I move) which are a contant reminder of my bond to him, and on my right I wear a simple silver band locked with a tiny padlock charm as a more overt symbol of my submission to him.

I have to say the feeling of wearing them is incredible!

I'm a bit of a spoilt pet really but it doesn't take much more than a certain tone from my bf to bring me willingly into line

[Cherry]

Oooooh! I just LOVE slave bells! My first collar had slave bells, but after a whgile, they began to tarnish, so I removed them (which was ok with my girlfriend) because I felt they took away from the beauty of my collar.

We aren't overly formal in a great many ways either. I do defer to her tho, in any serious descision-making. I give my input on how I think and feel, and she takes that info into consideration when making the choice. Recently, we went out to eat. She knows what I like to eat. I'd given a couple different choices of what I'd like. (It wasn't that hard, really, since I like alfredo sauce and chicken.) And she then ordered my food. Some people might not find that strange. Otyhers might. I personally enjoy it. It makes me feel somehow "fept".

I'm spoiled, too. More often than not I start giving attitude. I start getting cocky and lippy, and it usually takes just THAT tone and I'm being the good lil subbie that I love to be.

One of my personal favorites is when she refers to me as "the girl". She'll be talking to friends about me and she'll say "Oh, the girl and I were talking about this the other day." The first time she did it, I don't think she realized it. I pointed it out to her, and told her how I enjoyed it. Since then, she does it more often. Granted, she doesn't do it around everyone. Just those who are aware of our little dynamic. But she DOES call me girl, as well as slut and a few other names that might offend people here. I don't find them offensive, but that's just because I know when they're said, they are said out of complete love.

Originally posted by Sadako
.....

.... I am very happy .....

... him ..in...control ...... my discretion .... symbolising our everlasting love ..... so ....beautiful ...

... slave .... a contant ... bond to him, and ... simple .... overt ,,,,submission to him.

.......I have to say the feeling .... is incredible!

.... a spoilt pet really but it doesn't take much more than a certain tone from my bf to bring me willingly into line

Sadako - you have done the subs of the world GREAT justice - you have so eleoquently explained the true meaning of the thoughts of a slave ..... why we become a slave, remain a slave..... no more words need be said than these you have spoken like a true slave

Originally posted by Cherry

D/s or BDSM is a braod range of life choices. One can't look at someone else's life and say, "Well, you aren't a sub/slave because you don't kneel at the door and wait for permission to speak," or "Yuo aren't a sub/slave because you're wear jeans and a t-shirt around the house."

I totally agree with you Cherry. One of the main reasons I've never tried to get involved with a local BDSM community is because of the judgemental attitude of many prominent figures within it.

Fair enough there are safety rules that I think everyone who wants to experiment with BDSM needs to read and employ. But to have someone tell you "if you can't follow all these behaviour rules you are not a true submissive" is absurd.

I know regardless of how it is expressed the want to please my bf and my nature to want to submit are true and deep and that's all that matters to me.

If anyone tries to tell you what you're not, they're almost certainly wrong.

Just as there are many levels and forms of submission, there are many different levels and forms of Dominance to match each one perfectly.