Will a vibrator make it harder to reach orgasim with my bf?

[Henner]

So, I've been thinking about introducing a vibrator into my masturbation because my boyfriend is usually gone to graduate school. I always wondered though, if I start to masturbate with a vibrator, will this make it harder for me to orgasm with my boyfriend during sex?

I ask this because I know many women can have multiple orgasms with vibrators but only one (if at all) with their boyfriend, and I wonder if that has anything to do with their use of the vibrator. I have orgasms with my boyfriend, which is amazing btw, but it takes me a little bit to orgasm and I don't want to lose that. I don't want sex with a toy to be better than my sex with my boyfriend.

So is there any truth to this?

[Chinball_Wizard]

Many years ago, not going to say how many, I used to have trouble reaching my climax when having sex with my lover. Like you, I had no trouble when it was just me and one of my toys. I finally figured out, and this is just what works for me, that while I was trying to orgasm myself, I was also trying to be a hot, sexy, lover. When I try to do two things at the same time in my regular life, I usually end up doing them poorly. What made me think it would be any different in my sex life.
Now, once I settle into a nice rhythm, I concentrate on me. I rub my clit, pinch and pull my nipples, I've even fingered my own ass. My point is, like most things in life, if you want it done right, do it yourself.
Sure I could lay back and let my lover work his magic. Eventually I would probably cum, but it would take a while. I would also be concentrating on NOT trying to give myself an orgasm. Back to the two tasks at the same time.
I've never had a guy complain about me bringing myself off, while he's doing his thing. Give yourself all the pleasure you can, chances are he will think he did it anyway.

[LostSerenity]

I've been using vibrators for a long time, but it hasn't stopped me from having orgasms with my boyfriend either. However, I am one of those people who needs clitoral stimulation to cum during sex. So I usually bring out the vibrator while we're doing it, and I must say it gives me a pretty damn amazing orgasm. And yes I have had multiple orgasms with my boyfriend too. So in my opinion getting a vibrator will only add to the experience

[Ann Andriani]

Originally Posted by Henner

...So is there any truth to this?

If you're having orgasms now with your boyfriend without using a vibrator, that's great. If you have orgasms during masturbation without using a vibe that's also great. How you see your vibrator use, is mostly how it will affect you. If you believe that it will give you trouble with your b/f, then chances are it will. However, if you look at using a vibe as just a variation or as some additional assistance when you feel you've been sitting on that orgasmic cliff for way too long, then it's all good.

I'm one of those women that need a vibe most of the time for that extra push. However, I can and have had very pleasurable orgasms with Larry without the use of a vibe.

So why don't you start small, try out a dildo only or a dildo with a vibe in it. That way, you'll get the divine feeling of fulfillment and penetration from the dildo without the vibrations. Then if you want to add the vibrations you can. Start slow, get something that has variable vibrations, so you can start on the low setting. Also, if you find this is something you enjoy having during sex, bring it into partner sex.

I linked to some additional articles that I wrote, that should also help you sort through this. The bottom line, using a vibrator is not a bad thing. Switch up your play, use it some times and then other times you don't use it, you'll be just fine.
If you have any other questions, don't hesitate to ask.
Ann

[MistressSavanna]

Personally, I've noticed no difference after having brought a vibrator into my masterbatory adventures. In fact, I've even advanced to using a G-Spot vibrator and a regular one on my clit at the same time When having sex with my partner, I usually rub my clit or use a vibe on it and either way the sparks fly!

If you're feeling up to an adventure, try it

GOOD LUCK!

[Alastrina]

I think it's just all a state of mind, really.
My bf has no problem with me using a vibrator and sometimes will grab my favorite one and use it on me while we're going at it hot and heavy. I think it's GREAT!!

[always learning]

I have a hard time orgasming without a vibrator. We use it a lot during sex. The vibrator is the only way I can orgasm alone. I think it would probably help to try without it alone and figure out what stimulation will do the trick in the bedroom, but it takes so long so I eventually give up. I guess I'll have to keep practicing

[Ann Andriani]

Originally Posted by always learning

I have a hard time orgasming without a vibrator. We use it a lot during sex. The vibrator is the only way I can orgasm alone. I think it would probably help to try without it alone and figure out what stimulation will do the trick in the bedroom, but it takes so long so I eventually give up. I guess I'll have to keep practicing

While it's never a bad thing to use a vibe during sex, if it makes you feel self-conscious, you should mix things up. Use a vibe sometimes and then other times use your fingers. Getting used to not using a vibe takes some getting used to, but it can be done. I'm sure you'll prefer some clitoral stimulation during intercourse. I used to feel like I needed the vibe all the time, and I want it most, but there are also times when I use my fingers alone to climax. Both work well, however, I usually prefer the vibe.

I'm actually in the process of reviewing the We-Vibe, it's a brand new vibrator that they're touting can be worn during intercourse. It's kind of cute, looks like mini purple tongs to eat finger foods with. I've masturbated with it twice already and it was rather enjoyable. I'll let you know how it works out during intercourse.

So you may want to keep your eyes peeled for these newer vibes, that are made for couples. May make sex more pleasurable for the both of you by providing hands free clitoral vibrations.

You know they do say practice makes perfect, so enjoy the change of pace and get those fingers down there and practice. There's actually a good book by Sadie Allison called Tickle Your Fancy. It teaches women how to masturbate with and without a vibrator. Here's my review of it.

Ann