i can't orgasm!

[Ash69N]

I can't orgasm i try and try and i feel so close and yet i can't relax enough to let it cum, i feel like i am going to pee and that freaks me out. I use a rabbit vibrator and stick the ears inside which works very well but i never feel fully satified ever I dont know what to do! help

[Luvoral]

Honey,quit worrying first of all. It usually takes time for us women to understand how our bodies work. Get yourself into the mirrow and admire your body,carress it from top to bottom and enjoy the feeling and next time you use your vibrator use your other hand to massage your clitoris,thighs,nipples,etc...

Give yourself plenty of time to enjoy yourself and let your mind wander into nice thoughts. Usually playing with your clit will give you an orgasm more likely than just vaginal penetration. Toys are fun but your fingers can really find your real sensative areas or touch. Most women don't get orgasms from penetration,it's clitoral stimulation.

[igor]

Originally Posted by Ash69N

i feel like i am going to pee and that freaks me out.

My understanding is that some women get that feeling just before they have "female ejaculation." If you peed before you got down to business, then I'd certainly not be afraid of what might happen and just let go. I hear it is a wonderful experience. Nothing to be freaked out about.

[Nelly]

Originally Posted by Ash69N

I can't orgasm i try and try and i feel so close and yet i can't relax enough to let it cum, i feel like i am going to pee and that freaks me out. I use a rabbit vibrator and stick the ears inside which works very well but i never feel fully satified ever I dont know what to do! help

yea! i have that problem too! i always feel like i'm going to pee. I thought i was the only one... its hard to just relax

[Virgo]

Originally Posted by MorSake

Before you masturbate, make sure you PEE before hand.
If you don't you will pee and cum at the same time.

Seriously, why would you think that?! I have NEVER peed and cum at the same time, regardless of whether or not I peed before masturbating (and often I don't because if I have to pee I get turned on quicker). It is not a difficult think to control.

In response to the original poster's problem, I can't really relate to the sensation you describe, but often find that if you clench your pelvic floor muscles (the muscles you would use to keep from peeing) just before you feel you are about to cum it brings on the orgasm.

[madstyle]

Don't be shy to let it all out. even for us men it feels like you have to pee before you cum.

I guess it feels like you have to pee when you cum except much more pleasureable.

[Ann Andriani]

Originally Posted by Ash69N

I can't orgasm i try and try and i feel so close and yet i can't relax enough to let it cum...

I think you hit the nail on the head here. I feel your frustration in your post. The key to climaxing is relaxing enough to let it happen.

Yes, many women feel like have to urinate as they get close to orgasm, it doesn't mean they will, it also doesn't necessarily mean you're going to ejaculate. The best way to get past that mentally is to make sure you urinate before you masturbate. Then you'll know deep down that your bladder is really empty and urinating won't happen. So get rid of that concern first.

Also, give yourself time. From your post, you sound like you're in a hurry or a race to climax. Not everyone gets off quickly during masturbation.

Maybe a vibrator is too much. Maybe you're too sensitive to it. Some women are. The best thing you can do, is learn as much as you can about your body and women's bodies in general and then try stuff out, but it's important to be patient during the process.

Here's a few articles I wrote that should shed some light:

This is good information to have even when you're having sex with a partner.
Orgasm Tips for Women

http://www.allsexguide.com/masturbation_overview.htm

http://www.allsexguide.com/female_masturbation.htm

I also recommend Sadie Allison's Tickle Your Fancy.

The more knowledge you have and the more you understand your body, the better masturbation and better partner sex you'll experience.

If you have any further questions, don't hesitate to ask.
Ann